


Barney's Song

by TsarinaTorment



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Barney - Freeform, Friendship, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-11
Updated: 2013-09-11
Packaged: 2017-12-26 07:16:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/963130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TsarinaTorment/pseuds/TsarinaTorment
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lavi and Allen have discovered Barney's song... and have made their own versions...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Barney's Song

**Author's Note:**

> As always, this can also be found on fanfiction.net
> 
> Disclaimer: I don’t own D.Gray-Man

“Tempura soba,” Kanda grunted. It was 7am and, as usual, Kanda was first into the cafeteria.

“Coming right up!” Jerry said cheerfully – too cheerfully for Kanda’s liking. He might have been up since 5am, but it was still too early to be that cheerful. Actually, being that cheerful was illegal as far as he was concerned. He accepted the proffered tray and went to sit as far away from the doors and that too-cheerful chef as possible. He propped Mugen up against the table and focused on consuming the noodles. The task was quickly accomplished and he wrapped a hand around the mug of green tea that Jerry had thoughtfully provided. The two hours of training caught up with him and he propped his head on this other hand whilst waiting for the drink to cool, absorbing the heat with his hand. He entered a state of half-sleep, aware of his surroundings but not paying any attention to them.

Half an hour later, noise heralded the arrival of another two exorcists – Lavi and Moyashi. He ignored them completely, only vaguely aware of the parasitic exorcist ordering his usual mountain of food. He only paid attention to them when they sat down at his table – Moyashi next to him and Lavi opposite. Still, he attempted to ignore their loud, meaningless conversation as he deemed the green tea cool enough to drink. As he raised the mug to his lips, Lavi started to sing.

_“I love Yu,_  
 _Yu loves me,_  
 _We’re a happy family,_  
 _With a great big hug-”_ Here he hugged Kanda across the table.  
 _“-and a kiss from me to Yu-”_ and he gave Kanda a peck on the cheek.  
 _“-won’t Yu say he loves me too?”_

Kanda spat out the green tea in his mouth and reached for Mugen – only to find it wasn’t there. Panicking, he looked round and located it on the other side of Moyashi. That must have been why Lavi was hugging him so fearlessly.

“Give Mugen back!” he snarled, throwing Lavi off him. Moyashi cleared his throat. Kanda paled, wondering whether he was about to sing **that song** too. He was. Sort of.

_“I hate Yu,_  
 _He probably hates me too._  
 _And it’s very very true_  
 _That if there’s an intruder it’ll be okay,_  
 _Because Kanda’s on the way!”_

And he scarpered with Lavi, having finished his food, while Kanda sat in shock. Only laughter from the rest of the cafeteria snapped him out of it and he grabbed Mugen – which Moyashi had wisely left behind – and ran out of the cafeteria, intent on mutilating Lavi – Moyashi wasn’t so important was his song was true and hadn’t been a blow to his pride… unlike Lavi’s. Aha! There was a flicker of red and white as the two culprits dashed around a corner. A sadistic grin formed on his face.

Lavi’s scream could be heard throughout the order. (Correctly) assuming that it was Kanda’s revenge, no-one did anything about it and only Allen was sympathetic in the cafeteria later that day, mysteriously devoid of Mugen’s tell-tale wounds, although slightly bruised.

**Author's Note:**

> There we go. My first ever DGM fanfic finished! Oh, and both versions of Barney’s song are singable, although I have to give credit for Allen’s version to my sister, Spaice. This shouldn’t contain any implications of Yullen/AreKan or Yuvi/LaYu, it’s just a friendship fic!
> 
> Tsari


End file.
